...ok, folks...since i obviously can't post every adorable photo of our little cadence on this blog, i'm going to add new photos on a weekly basis to this yahoo photo album...i'll be adding the newest photos to the beginning...if you have high-speed internet and prefer the slideshow version, you can go here...
...so teddy went back to work a week & a half ago, which is why i hardly have any free time left any more to update this site...it's amazing how someone so little can take up so much time...and it's amazing how quickly cadence is changing and growing...she's gained 2lbs since we brought her home, and she doesn't seem to be eating any less...i'm scared that i won't be able to pump enough milk when i return to work to keep up with her feeding demands...
...we've been quite busy these past couple weeks...we visited ted's grandma carol, ted's sister lauren & bro jay at their new condo WAY out in the boondocks, ted's parents, and even made our first trip to the new millenium park downtown, where our friend phil met up with us...he took this family photo, which i'd been wanting for a long time, since most of the photos are of ted & cadence since i'm always the one behind the camera...
...my mom's been visiting a couple times a week so i can actually get out the apartment for a bit...i didn't think i'd want her coming around so often, but i have to say that i feel really lucky to have my mom only 40 minutes away...and she just adores cadence and can't get enough of her, so she's more than happy to come over whenever i need some help...for her birthday last week, i got her a baby photo album and put a couple dozen photos of cadence in it...she absolutely loved it, and couldn't stop looking at the photos...
...i don't know how i'll feel going back to work in a few weeks...teddy told me i'm gonna miss cadence a LOT when i do...i suppose i will...he said we should set up a webcam in our apartment so that i can still see her from work over the internet...i think i just might have to do that...
...you know what really prepared me for this stage of motherhood? all those months a couple years back when i was going to several shows a week and subsisting on about 4 hours of sleep a night...i remember nights back then if i got 5 hours of zzzs, that felt like so much sleep...cadence is apparently going through a growth spurt cuz she wants to feed like every hour during the day and every hour & a half or so during the night...not only that, she doesn't go back to sleep as easily and has been fussing a lot more...that means that each time i get up to feed her, it takes an hour to an hour and a half to get her back to sleep...like last night, i fell asleep around 10:30, and she let me sleep until 1:15, and that was the last time i got to sleep for more than 45 minutes at a time for the night...i'd say by the time i got up for the day at 8am, i'd had about 5 hours sleep total...but i feel fine...my previous sleep deprivation training is coming in handy now...i've even had breakfast, a shower, and lunch, and all before 2:00pm...
...i will admit though that every night, there's that window of time when i'm at my weakest, and i'm driven to making desperate prayers, invoking all 3 persons of the trinity and any angels in praying distance...'please...let her sleep 3 hours straight...just 3 hours and i'll be happy...pleeeeeeze...'
...but you know what makes it all worth it? when you see and hear her first giggle...yes, little cadence let out her first waking giggle today as her daddy was holding her...it was the cutest thing i've ever seen...her toothless grin and melodic gurgling giggle were so adorable! yeah...i doubt i'll ever look back on these times and say, 'i really wish i'd gotten more sleep...'
...at this time, i'd like to say a big thank you to sam beam (of iron & wine)...his calming voice has been the backdrop to many a feedings since we brought cadence home, mainly because i just happened to find iron & wine's 'the creek drank the cradle' cd on the floor one day, and i've been too lazy to change the cd in the cd player in our bedroom ever since...but there really is something about sam's voice that puts cadence in a deep, peaceful sleep as she feeds away...and even though the album has the 'F' word in one of the songs, when sam sings it, it just doesn't sound like a curse word...kinda like when neil halsted sings the 'F' word too...sam and neil both have those voices that are in a category all their own, at least in my book...i think cadence will grow up to agree with me...
...last saturday was ian moore's show @ schubas...we took cadence to the harmony grill, the restaurant attached to schuba's music room, since that's a smoke-free environment, and introduced her to ian and chris [ian's tour manager & multi-instrumentalist] before their show...our friends phil (teal) and kiara also met up with us @ schubas to meet cadence, and miss mia was bartending so she got to meet cadence too...i think all the excitement of meeting all these new people was too much for the little one, and teddy & i had to scrap our plan of taking turns going into the show...i was glad though that cadence was born in time to meet ian while he was in town...
...ian and i talked about how 2 years had already passed since his youngest son was born...i still remember when ian called me that night he was born...i was actually walking from my car to schubas for a show...and now the little tike is already two...it just goes to show how quickly these babies grow...ian told us to enjoy cadence while she's this little, and i totally agree... i've got 5 1/2 weeks left before i have to go back to work, and i plan on holding my little cadence as much as possible and enjoying every moment with her during this time, whether it's during the day or in the middle of the night...
...teddy goes back to work next week...i can't even tell you how much it's meant to have him home full time these past couple of weeks...i know he's changed over a hundred diapers cuz i can count the number of diapers i've personally changed on my two hands...maybe just one hand...he's been a trooper...in addition to diaper duty, he's organized our former disaster of an apartment, kept up w/ the laundry, dishes, cooking, etc...i don't know how i'm going to manage without him home all day...i'm going to have to learn how to use the car seat and the stroller if i don't want to be stuck at home all day long...
...now that i have been a mom for 2.5 weeks, let me share with you just a few of my favorite things about being cadence's mom...
1) her little smile...call it a sleep grin, call it gas--it still melts my heart every time i see the lovely corners of her mouth turn up...and when she has her big eyes locked on yours and flashes you her gummy little smile, you just fall in love all over again...
2) watching her fall asleep in my arms...i admit that my arms have gotten quite sore from all the time they've put into rocking the little one, but when those eyelids finally droop shut and she drifts off into a peaceful slumber and she looks absolutely angelic nestled in your arms, you know it's an honor to be able to do this and someday you'll totally miss it...
3) her little yelps...the very first thing i experienced of cadence once she was born was hearing her try out her pipes, and boy oh boy could she cry! these days it's not so much the bloodcurdling wail as little yelps as she wakes up or realizes she's hungry, and some of her sounds are just so adorably girly...i know that there are folks who say that you should let a baby "cry it out" if you don't want to spoil them, and as much as i adore her every little sound, the one thing i can't do is just stand by if her little yelps become a real cry, with real tears...i don't care what the grandmas say...you can't spoil a baby this young, and it's just not natural for a mom to not respond to her baby's cries...and being able to scoop your little baby quivering with cries into your arms and comforting her is another one of parenthood's privileges and joys...
4) seeing teddy play with his little girl...they are just so cute together...seeing her little tiny body cuddled in daddy's strong arms is such a beautiful sight to me...i know she'll grow up absoultely adoring her daddy and vice versa...
5) her squirms and wiggles...esp. when she's sleeping...i mean, she can get a real workout it seems sometimes, the way she moves around so much...it's hard to keep a blanket on her...
...6) her smell...babies do have this lovely innocent smell, and since cadence is breastfed, even when she's poopy, she smells sweet...i just love the way her onsies smell after she's worn them all day...
7) her many many faces...not just her smiles...her pouty bottom lip, her wide-eyed-'O'-shaped- mouth face, her searching-for-a-nipple-while-asleep face, her mouth-wide-open-while-asleep face, her little-tongue-peeking-out face, etc...
8) her warmth and softness...there's nothing like feeling the warmth of her little body next to my chest when i cradle her in my arms...or the softness of her little face as i brush her forehead or cheeks with my lips...
...i'm sure i'll come up with a lot more in the days and weeks and months and years to come...for now, i know that she won't stay so little for long, and i want to enjoy being able to hold her in my arms for as long as i can...
...well, it's day 10 as parents, and teddy is already bemoaning how quickly these little ones grow up...we are settling into a routine (as routine as babies get), and i think we're pretty lucky in that cadence sleeps quite a bit...we've managed to get 7-8 hours of sleep at night, and i even got a couple hours of nap time this afternoon...we're getting to know our little girl's cues so that we can figure our what she needs...it's pretty simple...her needs are pretty much confined to boob, diaper change, and being held...she definitely has a personality even at this tender age, and we're getting to know her little quirks...we just love holding her and gazing into her lovely dark eyes for long periods of time...and she has these little girl squeals that communicate exactly how she feels...but for the most part, she is sweet and calm and absolutely adorable...
...i'm recovering pretty well from the surgery...my incision is not bothering me as much, and i can get in and out of bed without excruciating pain...my feet are finally deflating, and i hope to soon fit into shoes other than the black sandals i wore every single day since around the middle of may...as for my tummy, however, i have no idea how to deflate that anytime soon...i feel like i'm wearing a rubber doughnut around my waist...
...my mom's been coming over a lot, bringing me the traditional korean food for new moms which is seaweed soup...other folks have brought us food too...ted's mom who's an awesome cook brought us a turkey & veggie soup that tastes so wholesome & homemade...our friend nanette brought us a ton of boston market goodies, including some of my favorite comfort foods like mashed potatoes and mac & cheese...and derek & linda becker brought us a huge tupperware full of veggie chili and a huge round of corn bread...it's nice to have folks take care of us...god knows we need all the help we can get...
