Shutterbug Mama

Some of you may be familiar with our struggles to get Cadence to use the potty. I was starting to think that there was something physically wrong with Cadence and that she was never ever going to get out of diapers, and I lost much sleep despairing over this issue.

I finally reached the end of my rope a couple weeks ago and started putting her in underwear inside her pants to see where that would lead. Well, after washing pee-soaked underwear and pants numerous times, I finally sat her in front of the TV on her potty and gave her as much watered-down juice as she wanted. When we had dinner, I sat her in her potty. I followed her around everywhere with that potty.

That method apparently worked, and in just a day, she was running to the potty on her own. She's gotten so good at it that she even pee-ed in the dark on Saturday night during the Lights Out for the Earth Hour.

It warms my heart so very much every time Cadence yells out "Mama! I made yellow! You have to see it!" And she takes her pee-filled potty to every visitor and insist that they look too. Our good friend (and new neighbor) Keom was over yesterday, and he didn't want to look at the pee, but I threatened him into compliance lest he hurt Cadence's feelings and throw a wrench in our potty progress so far.

So now, when we're at home, Cadence stays pantless in her underwear. She's still not pooping in the potty (except for once this past week), and I have no idea how we would get her to use the potty outside of home, but this is so much further ahead of where we were that I'm going to enjoy where we're at now. And I wouldn't have made it this far without the support of my mama friends Amy, Jenn and Sarah S-B. Thanks, ladies!

Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, cadence, parenting

Jen Lemen has a beautiful story and photo to share on Shutter Sisters, and so I thought I'd share a photo and story too.

I took the photo above at church on Easter Sunday. The woman you see sitting is Jan. She is the person who sits in the back of the sanctuary at her little table and hands out Sunday programs to latecomers (a category we fall into 90% of the time). She is there every Sunday, faithfully serving with a warm smile and kind, gentle eyes.

It may seem that what she does in the church is insignificant, but I know that is not true. Folks like her who serve their churches and communities and families in all the small things--quietly, humbly, faithfully--these are the true saints. They are not there for glory or to feed their egos or to score points with God. They see what needs to be done and do it, whether others are watching or not.

This is something I need to remember moment by moment. I live in an environment of seemingly endless self-promotion and a hunger for attention and recognition and grandiosity. I don't want to get sucked into that mentality, always calculating if doing this good deed or that will get me...get me what??? What is it that I want anyways? Fame? Respect? Envy? A pat on the back? Marketability? I sure hope those are not the things I want in my heart of hearts. This is why I so very much love the Small is Beautiful Manifesto.

I know that if Jesus were to come and throw a banquet at our church, he would personally take Jan by the arm and escort her to the seat next to him at the table. And that is the way it should be.

Labels: i.heart.berry.church, photos, stories

It's Love Thursday over on Shutter Sisters, so go check it out.

For my Love is Love is Love (Part 1) post, click here.

I had a long talk with my mother yesterday while she was over at our place. It probably was not the typical conversation you would expect between a daughter and her conservative evangelical Christian Korean mom. It had to do with her attitudes towards homosexuality. I think it was a mutually enlightening and shocking talk for the both of us. Shocking to her because she had no idea how strongly I felt about most churches' stance on and attitudes towards the LGBT community, and shocking to me because I had no idea how misinformed she was regarding homosexuality.

The reason I brought this topic up with her is that I've been wondering about the prevalence of Koreans coming out as LGBT in Korea and in the U.S., especially among the Korean Christian church subculture. While I do not make light of the persecution and discrimination faced by those who are LGBT in any culture, I can't help wonder about their experience in Korean culture because that is something I happen to be familiar with. Koreans are deeply ingrained in Confucianism, and reverence for elders and conformity to familial and society's expectations are deeply held values, while individuality is not. I know so many Koreans even here in the U.S. who repressed their artistic inclinations and dreams to become the doctors and lawyers and financial planners that their parents desired. I used to know a guy (Korean) whose parents threatened to commit double suicide at his wedding because he was marrying someone whose social class and educational background weren't good enough for them. And you thought those Korean soap operas were being melodramatic…

So my mom said that as far as she knew, people coming out openly as being LGBT was becoming more common in Korea, but that to her it was unheard of among Korean Christians in the U.S. That latter part is a bit dubious to me, and I would attribute it to either kids not telling their parents for fear of being disowned, of disappointing their parents, of rejection, etc. or to parents being too ashamed to talk about it and pretending it isn't true.

When I asked my mother point blank what she thought about the treatment of LGBT people by the church, she said it was something that she didn't feel the need to think about. The insinuation was that she didn't think it was that big of a deal, it didn't concern her, and she didn't feel like it was an issue deserving of her time and effort. I was flabbergasted. She was basically saying that she didn't care.

And I am afraid that she is not the only one amongst those deeply entrenched in the Christian subculture. Now I think I get it, how so many churches can stand by and do nothing while a significant segment of humanity is persecuted, harassed, discriminated against, and not afforded the basic right to be who they are—openly and without fear. It's because so many are misinformed, ignorant of facts, and too uncomfortable with the subject to realize that this is something they should care about.

Here is a list of a few things my mother was unaware of or misinformed about to give you an idea:

• Until recently, she didn't realize that being gay could be inborn. She thought it was deviant behavior born of deviant choices, and I'm pretty sure she would attribute it to demons. And while she now acknowledges that some people are born gay, she still thought this was the minority and that the vast majority of homosexuals could be "cured" through prayer and counseling if they REALLY wanted to change. She really believes that ex-gay ministries are successful.

• She let it slip that she believed AIDS to be a "gay" disease and in some way evidence that God condemns homosexuality.
  

• She thought homosexuality was just about physical sex. It didn't occur to her that homosexuals fall in love like heterosexuals do and that there's so much more to it than sex. I asked her if sex was the first and only thing on her mind when she had experienced falling in love or being attracted to someone, and she sort of got my point, but I could tell she still found it hard to believe that two people of the same sex could love each other the way heterosexuals do.

• She had no idea that there was even a debate on what the Bible actually says about homosexuality. This is a very common misconception. Something that doesn't really get discussed very often in fundamentalist or even Evangelical Christian churches is that the Bible WAS NOT WRITTEN IN ENGLISH!!!!!!! This may seem like an obvious thing, but when you're raised in the church, and that printed book so revered and idolized by everyone who has authority over you says that HOMOSEXUALS are going to hell, it doesn't occur to you that the word being translated as HOMOSEXUAL could mean something entirely different from the idea of a loving, committed relationship between two people of the same sex. There is, in fact, quite a bit of debate on what the Bible says about homosexuality (the very little it supposedly gets addressed at all), and I think that many, if not most, evangelicals assume that only liberal (and therefore unbiblical) Christians would go so far as to believe that the Bible does not condemn homosexuality as a sin.

And yet, I have hope. My mother didn't shut down the conversation, for one thing, and while she said she was shocked at my level of conviction, she did ask me for some books to help her better understand the issue. And while maybe she may not become the next Peggy Campolo (Tony Campolo's wife) of the Korean community, I can hope and pray that with a dispelling of myths and lies, and by hearing the stories of real people, that she will at least have more compassion for the LGBT community and have the courage to encourage those in her community and circle of relationships to do so as well.

Labels: christianity, family, love.is.love.is.love, love.thursday

I don't know who was dreaming of a white Easter, but they sure got it whoever they are. I think it was colder this Easter weekend than most Christmases in recent memory (except maybe this past one--it's been a brutal winter here, y'all).

I didn't buy Cadence an Easter dress this year. Part of the reason is that Easter fell so early I just forgot. Another reason is that I don't like Easter dresses. Cadence already runs to the mirror and admires her own reflection every time I put any dress on her, so I don't want her acquiring a taste for foofy frilly stuff. Unless it's vintage, like the dress she's wearing in the photo above, or hand-made. Then it's okay.

I don't think Cadence minded at all that I put her in an old dress over blue jeans for Easter festivities at Grandma and Grandpa's house. She had a blast searching for the Easter eggs Grandpa had hidden all over the house.

We also had fun making real Easter eggs with natural dyes. Thanks to Amy Geekgrl of Crunchy Domestic Goddess for the tips! We found that turmeric and curry powder make a lovely yellow, paprika makes a nice brownish orange, and blueberries make an awesome lavender/purple. Next year, I think I want to use spinach for green and find a good source for making a really bright red.

I hope you all had a Happy Easter/First-Weekend-of-Spring!


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, cadence, family, photos

The lovely Tracey Clark has tagged me for the "7 weird things about me" meme. I have to admit I really had to think about this one because I'm quite boring. I mean, yeah, I'm plenty WEIRD, but it's really BORING weird, not INTERESTING weird. Here's what I've come up with, at any rate. Oh, and I'm including seven weird photos as a bonus.

1. I grew up in a fundamentalist evangelical-wannabe cult called University Bible Fellowship. You can read more about that shenanigan here and here. That's probably the most profoundly and absolutely weirdest thing about me.

2. I have no tolerance for violence in movies or TV. It's not a MORAL thing. It's more like I-hit-the-floor-and-cover-my-head-lest-the bullets/demons/knives-fly-off-the- screen-right-at-me kind of thing. When we were kids, one of our favorite shows was Barnaby Jones. I used to run out of the room regularly during that show to avoid even the possibility of witnessing someone getting punched in the nose.

3. Growing up, my family subscribed religiously to Time Magazine. I read just about every issue almost cover to cover, BUT, and here's the weird part, I always started with the last page. To this day, if I happen to come across a copy of Time, I turn to the last page first. I think it must be my total lack of tolerance for any type of suspense.

4. I can't eat yellow bananas. They have to be at least slightly green, or I can't stand the taste. For this reason, numerous bananas are left to turn black in our home. Which is okay because then Ted makes banana bread which I really like.

5. I've been with the same company for 12 years. Apparently, this is considered weird by some of my peers. Fortunately, I really like the folks I work with, I LOVE my boss, and I'm treated really well there.

6. I can't read non-fiction without falling asleep unless it's about parenting, a memoir, biography or historical in nature. This posed a problem to my educational success, as most of the required reading (except for history and Englist Lit) would fall into the category of non-fiction that I just couldn't get through. I have no idea how I got through college, let alone grad school.

7. I have this thing about taking photos of people's shoes, especially when I'm at a rock show. It's not a fetish or anything, just one of my quirks.

Now it's time to tag some folks, so I tag the following and whoever else wants to join in:

Leigh (Mere Mortal)
Christina (Momology)
Maya (Laurent Files)
Amy Geekgrl (Crunch Domestic Goddess)
Paige (Look Away)

This happens to be a "Links Around the World" meme, so if you participate, add your blog link to the end of the list on your own post (I copied and pasted the code from the View Source to get all the links).

Link Addiction ~ Ardour of the Heart ~ When Life Becomes a Book ~ The Malaysian Life ~ Yogatta.com ~ What goes under the sun ~ Roshidan’s Cyber Station ~ Sasha says ~ Arts of Physics ~ And the legend lives ~ My View, My Life ~ A Simple Life ~ Juliana RW ~ Mom Knows Everything ~ Beth & Cory’s Mom ~ A Mind Forever Voyaging~ enjoying the ride ~ Jennifer’s thoughts ~ Mom of 3 Girls ~ Amanda ~ Don’t Make Me Get The Flying Monkeys ~ ExPat Mom ~ Just Jessie ~ Wilson Six ~Krisitn ~ Nuttier Than You ~ Shonnte ~ Summer’s Nook ~ Laura Williams Musings ~ Sher ~ Shanda ~ Seven QTPies ~ Mel ~ Skittles ~ Lady Banana ~ Momhood Moments ~ Business Mars ~ A Simple life ~ moms….. check nyo ~ Mommy’s Little Corner ~ Pampered ~ HappyHeart ~ Make Every Day Your Lucky Day ~ Thumbelina Creations ~ Ivonnardona's Creations ~ Jewellery Craft ~ A Bead a Day~ Useless Ramblings ~Candid Yammering ~ Green Eyed Mama ~ Mother May I ~ Shutterbug Mama

Labels: about.me, memememe, photos

It's the 2nd day of spring, and Chicago celebrated in usual fashion with totally inappropriate weather. It's been dubbed "snizzle" (snow+drizzle), and it's pretty nasty.

It wasn't so bad this morning when we made a rare family trip to Metropolis, our favorite coffeehouse. By the afternoon, however, things started piling up. Luckily, the weather didn't stop the UPS truck from delivering my eagerly and long-awaited Singer Genie 353 sewing machine.

Here she is in all her lovely vintage glory. I have to admit it was the flower power pattern that totally sold me. It also got really good reviews on some sewing sites.

Ain't she a beauty? Now if I can only figure out how to raise the bobbin thread. I think I might have to take the Genie to Easter dinner for a lesson from Ted's mom...

Hope y'all are having more seasonably springy weather in your part of the world.

Labels: me.so.crazy, photos, sewing, spring.fever

I know I post photos of Cadence and Rudden a lot, but I just loved this shot of them sharing a Snoopy book together. It actually started out with them both grabbing the book at the same time and could've gotten ugly. But I happened to be there and suggested that Cadence hold one side and Rudden the other so they could read to each other. Redirection doesn't always work, but lucky for me, this time it did, and I had time to shoot a few photos of them.

And today happens to be Rudden's mom's birthday, so Happy Birthday, Amy! I took this shot of Rudden just for you. Oh, and he was totally posing, too. Cadence had already run off and was yelling for him to follow, but he lingered, waiting for me to take the shot.


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, birthday, friends

Hi, y'all. I'm posting the 3rd Sunday of the month in addition to the 1st Sunday over on Shutter Sisters. My latest post called Just Shoot It is up now.

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

I know I've complained and complained about the brutal winter we've had in Chicago before, so for once I am happy to report that the temperatures actually SOARED into the 50's yesterday. And thank goodness, as I've been itching to hit the streets for a photoshoot.

The winter's been extra hard on me, as it's left me uninspired to take photos of anything or anyone. Except for the occasional shots of Cadence and friends, it's been a dry spell for me shutterbug-wise. And I've especially missed one of my favorite activities--street photography.

Thanks to the time change this week, I had about an hour-and-a-half of natural light left after I got home from work last night, and I immediately rushed out with my camera. I kept things simple with just my 30mm lens since I HATE changing lenses. I didn't know where I was going to go shoot when I got in my car. I wanted to visit my favorite haunts in Wicker Park, but traffic on Clark Street was a bear, and the light wasn't getting any brighter, so I headed on over to New Chinatown in Uptown, by Argyle and Broadway.

If you live on the Northside of Chicago and get a hankering for pho or dim sum or a Chinese bakery, this is the place to go. The neighborhood is also called Little Vietnam or Little Cambodia, as many of the shops and restaurants and residents have connections to Southeast Asia, as opposed to mainland China.

While I was shooting some photos, I happened to hear someone calling my name. It was one of my best friends, John, who was riding his bike down Argyle on his way to a bar called Big Chicks on Sheridan. Funny thing was, I had left a message on John's answering machine that morning telling him I'd be doing a photoshoot that evening. I didn't say where, and he never even got the message as he hadn't been home all day, so it was quite a pleasant surprise to run into him.

I feel a bit rusty when it comes to shooting, so I'm going to have to do a bunch more of these photoshoots. Back when I was a single gal living alone on the Wicker Park/Bucktown border, I did a photoshoot wherever I went. I think that was a little extreme, and now (especially with a kid) I recognize the need to put away the camera sometimes and just let things BE. But still, I can't help feeling a bit nostalgic about those days...

I'll post some other photos from last night in a slideshow below so you don't have to keep scrolling forever. Just click on the photo to go to the next one, or click on a thumbnail to see that photo.

Labels: i.heart.chicago, memory.lane, photography, photos

So my friend Tim Lowly, husband of our church's wonderful pastor Sherrie Lowly and instigator for the Tim Lowly Ensemble which Ted drums for, also happens to be a talented and well-respected painter. He is a teacher/artist-in-residence at North Park University, where he also directs the gallery. I have been a fan of Tim's paintings for as long as I've known him. His images often resonate with the deepest places of my heart, and someday I'm going to scrape together enough money to buy me one of his works.

Lately, however, he's been making more and more art in Photoshop with photos he's taken. The stuff is pretty amazing. He posted the "photo" above of Cadence on his Flickr stream, and I absolutely love it. I'm not a big fan of drastic Photoshop alterations (I can't even get simple textures down), but the stuff that Tim does just makes my jaw drop. I highly recommend mosing on over there and having a looksy. He also posts his paintings and drawings, which are also amazing.

Labels: art, flickritis, friends, photography, tim.lowly

A week ago, I wrote a post on Shutter Sisters about How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Blur. My best shot for this week fits quite nicely with that post. I snapped this photo while chasing Cadence down our hallway. There's something about this photo that I just love (and I don't say that about too many of my photos). Sometimes, the most perfect way to capture my little whirlwind-of-a-child is like this--a total blur.

In other news, it was Ted's 31st birthday on Saturday (which coincidentally was the 6th anniversary of this here blog). We celebrated w/ a few friends and family members at an Ethiopian place called Ethiopian Diamond. It's been a long time since I've had Ethiopian, and I forgot just how delicious it is. Chicago, esp. the North side has a large Ethiopian population, so there are a number of restaurants to choose from. I think we picked a pretty good one and hope to go back.

After dinner, we headed back to our place for more libations, including shots of a really really good bottle of scotch that I bought Ted for Valentine's Day. As you can see from this photo of Erik, the scotch had its intended effect.

So is anybody else's kid suffering from sleep deficit due to the time change? I have to say, that's the last time we have a late-night gathering on the eve of a spring-forward time change. We had to be up for church the next morning, and Cadence ended up getting only 8 hours of sleep Saturday night. Ouch.


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, birthday, cadence, friends, photography, teddy

It's Love Thursday over on Shutter Sisters, so go check it out.

The image above is something I shot back in my filmSLR days of old. I stumbled upon this little anonymous tree-hugging love offering while visiting a friend in River North probably back in 2001. The reason I chose this image is because I've been wanting for a really, really long time to write about a topic I call Love is Love is Love (borrowed from Margaret Cho.) Yes, I'm talking about homosexuality and lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgendered/transsexual rights.

All you liberal, humanity-loving, diversity-embracing bloggy friends of mine may wonder why I even bother to post about this. Shouldn't it be a given that Love is Love is Love? Yeah. I know. I'm actually writing this because I come from a conservative Evangelical Christian background, and I want to do a few things.

First, I want to let my more conservative-leaning readers and friends know how I got to believe what I believe on this topic. Many of them knew me back when I was a card-carrying Evangelical, and even then I felt uncomfortable w/ the standard church teaching on this topic, and maybe some of them have the same questions I had and I want them to dig deeper and seek answers outside what the church would say. Yes, I want to challenge them, but as lovingly and humbly as I can.

Second, I want my friends and loved ones in the LGBT community to know that it IS in fact possible for a Christian to change his or her mind on this issue (I'm a prime example) and to hold onto the hope that someday they will be welcomed by the Christian community with open arms without condemnation.

Third, this is something that has weighed heavily on my heart for a few years now, and I believe very strongly that it is the prodding of the Holy Spirit. Excuse me for falling back into Evangelical jargon, but I have felt for a long time the Holy Spirit saying to me that the church's stance on homosexuality is going to be the next big shift, such as slavery and racism and the role of women were in the past. I realize that not ALL churches have changed their stances on these other issues, but for the most part the church (and I guess I'm talking mainly Protestant here) has changed its original views on these topics, even though they had once used the Bible to justify such things as slavery, racism and the submission of women.

Fourth, I'm writing about this because people are being beaten and killed because of of their sexual orientation. Now, I've said before that I believe the devil wrote the sinner's prayer, and this--this homophobia based on a few verses in Scripture that even the Biblical scholars can't agree upon, this homophobia that has historically been sanctioned by so many churches and Christian--it smells pretty devilish to me.

Anyhoo, I won't get into it all now as I'm out of time for blogging, but this will be my first installment of probably several posts over the next few weeks.

Labels: christianity, love.is.love.is.love, love.thursday

On Saturday, Cadence and I went to the Kohl's Children's Museum in Glenview, IL, just down the road from my mom's place. It was our first time there, and Cadence had a blast.

There was so much to do, from the moment you walk in. Like all these little doors to open and close? That was even before we went through the admission line. I had to watch Cadence like a hawk because she'd see something cool from a distance and just bolt in that direction.

We were only there for a couple hours because my mom was expecting us for lunch, and boy, was it was hard to get Cadence to leave. I think we could easily spend a good four hours there on a regular basis. Plus, they have Kim & Scott's Twisting Cafe which sells gourmet pretzels. Holy cow, the best darn pretzels I've had in my LIFE. And they're made with quality, fresh ingredients! Check your grocer's frozen goods department and you may find some there.

So here's the latest thing that Cadence said that got me cracking up:

Ted: I'm pooped.
Cadence: Then go to the potty.

This kid. I just can't get enough of her.


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, Cadence-isms

Hi, folks. I've got a post up on Shutter Sisters today. Check it out:

How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Blur

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

I definitely don't get around to listening to as much music as I used to, but I did go on a CD buying binge this past week, so I thought I'd mention it.

First of all, I finally got around to watching the movie Once on Sunday night. In fact, we were probably watching it the very moment that Glen and Marketa were accepting their Oscar for Best Song from that movie. We don't have TV reception, so I wasn't watching the Oscars, and since we haven't seen any movies in the theater this past year except for one kids flick, we had no interest in the Oscars and had no idea that these guys were up for an award.

So of course, the very next day, I ordered both the soundtrack to the movie Once, Glen and Marketa's album as The Swell Season, plus For the Birds by The Frames, the band that Glen fronts. I tend to be a completist, so I can see myself ordering some more albums by The Frames. I highly recommend them.

Second, I found out this week that my favorite kids musicmaker Elizabeth Mitchell and Daniel Littleton recently released a new album for their grown-up band Ida. I immediately went to their label Polyvinyl's website and ordered Lover's Prayer. It is lush, it is beautiful, it is haunting, it is most excellent. I highly recommend it.

Third, because I can't just order one CD at a time, I also ordered a couple albums by various incarnations of Mike Kinsella. That is to say, I ordered the latest (latest as in from November of 2006--I told you I'm behind) full-length from Owen (which is basically Mike Kinsella's current solo outfit) and the one full-length from American Football (which Mike fronted back in the late 90's). I haven't listened to the latter album yet, but I did listen to the Owen album (titled At Home With Owen) twice back-to-back tonight. I've been a fan since I saw him live at Schubas back in the latter part of 2002.

I have to admit that my affinity for the music of Owen is a guilty pleasure. Honestly? His songs are kind of whiny and cynical, lyrically. He obviously has spent a lot of time thinking about his life. But damnit, the boy makes beautiful music, and I can't help getting sucked into the melancholy. I know some folks can't stand emo of any sort (punk, folk, indie, whatever), so if that's you, you probably won't like this stuff. Me, on the other hand, I LIVE for that emo rubbish.

Labels: music, random.thoughts