Shutterbug Mama

One of the challenges as a photographer (and for any artist for that matter) is trying new things so that you don't get bored. And lately, I must admit that I HAVE been bored. So this week, like I posted over on Shutter Sisters yesterday, I decided to break a few of my own rules. Like in the photo you see above. For one thing, it's not in vibrant color. It's also got a bit of grain to it, which is something I normally try to avoid in my photos. And it's just a tad blurry. I don't have a problem w/ blur, but usually when I go for blur, I make it clear that I was going for blur so you wouldn't think it was just cuz I couldn't keep my camera still. I basically cranked up the ISO to 800 (which is high for me), shot in a moving car at night, and didn't worry about it. And you know what? There's something about that photo that I really love.

And here's another one taken about the same time through the back window of the car. Normally, I wouldn't have put the back windshield wiper in the frame, nor would I have taken a photo through such a dirty window, but I think those elements add a genuine dynamic to the photo that I really like.

In this photo, I totally chopped off the dude's head, and that wouldn't have been a normal choice for me for a shot that was framed w/ so much empty space. But it totally works for me and makes the image that much more interesting to not know what the musician's face looks like.

It was another busy weekend, and I'll leave the recap to another post, but it was really exciting for me to take photos in new ways, pushing past my comfort zone, and ending up with images that I just absolutely love, regardless of whether other people will "get it" too.


Don't forget to go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey's Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, photography, shutter.sisters

I've got a new post up on Shutter Sisters called Break the Rules. Go check it out if you have a chance. Hopefully, I'll get my act together for tomorrow's Best Shots post.

P.S. That shot is of Cadence at Nichols Park in Hyde Park on the South Side. We were in the neighborhood Friday night for a benefit show.

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

#1--I had a new post up on Shutter Sisters the beginning of the month. You can see all my past posts on Shutter Sisters by clicking here. I post every 1st and 3rd Sundays of the month, so I'll have another one up this Sunday.

#2--I got to see the band Frisbie at the Taste on the 4th of July while Cadence and I were on our mini-vacation. This was a big accomplishment for me as it was actually on my list of things to do that day. I almost missed them because they played 45 minutes earlier than I thought they were scheduled to. Luckily, I was foraging for food near the stage around the time they started playing, and I recognized their music right away and hurried over there. Cadence fell asleep after the first song, so I shot the entire set of photos sitting down at a table with Cadence in my left arm, and shooting w/ my zoom lens with my right.

#3--I took some really fun photos while on our mini-vacation. There was so much to see. I'll spare you the clicking to Flickr with a Pictobrowser (sorry if you can't see this in your feed):

#4--I made Cadence a new dress. It flippin' ROCKS. This was a t-shirt Ted used to wear back when we first started dating. It doesn't fit any more. Now it's a dress.

#5--Last last Saturday (the 5th), I had the honor of photographing The Maplewood Summer Olympics. Cadence was in the medal round for the Short Jump at one point. It's really harder than it sounds, even when you're half the size of everyone else. Lots of craziness ensued that night, including a bit of a SNAFU involving Cadence and vodka watermelon, but it's all good. Again, I'll resort to good old Picto to paint the picture:

#6--Cadence and I went to the Shedd Aquarium last Monday with my our friends Amy (the mom), Rudden and Jack. We had fun, but Cadence did run out the door with a stuffed penguin at one point (because I wouldn't buy it for her) and there were at least a couple major meltdowns. We survived, though. Fortunately, Amy is one of those friends who I know won't judge us in the present or hold this against us in the future.

#7--The day after Ted came home, we had a BBQ at our friend Yvonne's whose condo building has this ginormous patio overlooking their private beach. We really like Yvonne's neighbors and friends, so it was a good time. I had fun taking photos of the kids, and the lake and sky were just gorgeous.

#8--So the exhibit and Wicker Park Grace's Rent Party fundraiser were on Saturday. I got lucky that Tim V., who is active at WPG, was there on Saturday during the day when I came in to hang my photos. Tim is an artist and has a lot of gallery experience, so he basically put all my photos up for me.

I was surprised by how many people showed up, including folks who never let on that they would be there, like my friend Denise and her son Zachary. My brother brought a whole contingent from his church. All in all, the evening was a success. Lots of folks showed up to raise money for WPG, and I sold 4 frames prints from the exhibit and 2 more in the silent auction and received orders for a few more. Considering I had 15 pieces total, I'd say that was a pretty good night. Thanks to everyone who came out or who sent me notes of congrats or helped pick photos for the exhibit. I don't think my photography could have come this far without all the support I've gotten from you all.


And that will be my last Pictobrowser for this post. Those are the photos from Saturday night. Alright. I think that's quite enough for one post.

Oh, wait. One more thing. I've started a daily photoblog on my new website. This will be mainly about the photo and not so much about life in general, and most of the photos will be non-Cadence related. Some of the photos will be from the archives--stuff I never had a chance to post here but really liked and want to talk about. If you're interested in hearing me talk just about my photos, you can check it out.

Labels: friends.who.rock, photography, photos, this.busy.life

Apparently, putting together a photo exhibit in a matter of DAYS wasn't enough of a challenge for me, so I decided to create a new website as well. Here it is, folks: www.sarah-ji.com. This will be my photography site, and not so much a blog. There will be a blog that will focus on more of my artsy photos, but I probably won't be doing too much talking over there. Oh, and the reason I HAD to design a new website? Because I decided to print up interim business cards to have available on Saturday at the opening/fundraiser. Ted just approved the proofs at Kinko's, so I should have them by tomorrow.

So do you all remember this photo I took a couple weeks ago, the day before Ted left on tour? I happened to enter it into a photo contest on photographer MeRa Koh's blog, and I got chosen as one of the finalists! You can vote on the best photo on MeRa's blog here. And for the record, I'm not soliciting votes for myself. I was more excited about the nice things MeRa had to say about the photo as well as her kind mention of Shutter Sisters. I will totally respect you if you don't vote for me, and in fact I will be happy that you feel secure enough in our relationship to vote for what you REALLY think is the best photo.

Anyhoo, I found out that this photo was also printed in last week's print edition of the Chicago Reader. They told me they were going to print it, but I didn't know it would be so soon, so I didn't pick up a copy. If anyone has an extra one lying around, let me know! It was the daily photo on their web version on Friday June 27th.

Also, this photo was featured on Gapers Block's Rearview last Thursday, and it was the Daily Photo on Chicago Public Radio's website on July 1st. So it's made the rounds of the Chicago media sources I like to frequent, which is cool.

There been so much going on, and I always feel bad when I fall so behind on updating around here, but that's the way it goes for now. Hope you all have a lovely weekend!

Labels: news, photography

I've been so busy that I forgot to tell you all that I've got my first photo exhibit opening this Saturday. It's not a formal gallery show, but it's in the space for Wicker Park Grace which is a cool lofty building in the Wicker Park/Bucktown area. They're doing a fundraiser Rent Party with live music, food and drinks for $15 this Saturday in their space at the Acme Building at 1741 N. Western at 8pm. My photos are going to liven up the space for the event and stay up for another month or so. Two of them will be sold in the silent auction, and the rest (another dozen maybe) will be up for sale with 50% of sales going to benefit Wicker Park Grace.

You can read more about it here.

Also, if you'd like to give input on which photos should be included in the exhibit or auction, please go to my Flickr account and leave your comments. If you don't have a Flickr account, you can always email me at shutterbugmama[dot]com[at]gmail[dot]com. I've narrowed down the selection to a couple dozen (thanks to those of you who've already commented, by the way).

Like I said, it's been really busy around here, but the most important part is that Ted's back home. Yay!

And here he is looking more like a trucker than ever. And proud of it, too.

Labels: photography, wicker.park.grace

Some of you may remember an interesting photoshoot I did in April of my friend Jessica Hannah's graduate thesis performance/installation for Columbia College. Well, Jessica and her fellow robotic housewives will be performing once again this Friday, June 13th (an auspicious date, eh?) to open Ladylike: A Proper Take on Feminist Art group exhibit at Koscielak Gallery in Wicker Park.

I'm especially excited as Jessica has informed me that the curator will make prints of my photos available for purchase if anyone is interested. I don't know who would want to buy photos of robotic companions, but it's just exciting to think that someone POSSIBLY might. Plus, the gallery is using a couple of my photos to promote the show, one on their website and one on the invite for the opening reception:

Two of the artists also exhibiting are Korean-American women, so I want to check that out too. If you have the chance to see this on Friday night, I highly recommend it. The performance piece of Jessica's installation will only be for this Friday night. There's some video and other visual stuff that will be part of the exhibit through July 3oth.

So here's the info:

LADYLIKE: A proper take on feminist art
Krista Babbitt (Chicago), Andrea Dezso (New York), Jessica Hannah (Chicago), Sally Ko (Chicago), Ke-Sook Lee (Kansas City),Emma McCagg (New York), Lorraine Peltz (Chicago), Abigail Pope (New York), Susan Sensemann (Chicago),Stacia Yeapanis (Chicago).

The exhibition LADYLIKE is curated by Joanne Hinkel.
Opening reception
Friday, June 13, 2008
6 - 9 pm
Koscielak Gallery
1646 N. Bosworth Ave
Exhibition runs through July 31st.

Labels: art, friends, photography

Ok, I'm feeling a bit more up to posting photos from the weekend after taking a half-day vacation yesterday. Just a few of my favorites. You can see ALL my favorites in the pictobrowser in yesterday's post. As you can see from this shot above, we were kinda high up above the beach. So the wedding ended up being on the lawn overlooking the beach, and not actually on the beach, because somebody probably would've hurt themselves trying to walk down to the beach (most likely me).

I took this one of the groom Dave and two of his siblings through the screen door. I like the soft glow the screen door filter created, kind of like the time I took a photo of Cadence through a pair of pink tights.

I thought this was a cute one of my friend Alana the bride peeking out while waiting to walk down the "aisle." I loved all the songs that were played as part of the prelude, including Big Star's "I'm In Love With a Girl", which kind of threw me for a loop as this is the first song on Cadence's Sleepy Songs CD which we play for every nap and at bedtime. I almost started looking for Cadence so I could put her to bed. They also played Wedding Day, which our friend Ian Moore often sings (it's an Alejandro Escovedo song) and which I also played as part of the prelude for my wedding. The wedding party walked down to "New Day," one of my favorite Ian Moore songs (Ian is how Alana and I know each other).

And this is the maid of honor, Alana's oldest daughter Autumn. This is probably my favorite people shot from the evening. She just looks so elegant and beautiful.

I thought it was funny that there was no champagne at the wedding, but there WAS Miller High Life, the Champagne of Beers. Heehee. I love how casual and laid back the whole wedding was, and this photo captures it pretty well.

This photo makes me so happy. Click on the photo to see a larger version, and you'll see that the dad's umbrella matches the daughter's outfit and vice versa. It was during the dancing portion of the reception. Yeah, it rained.

It rained ALOT. But that didn't stop the bride from dancing with her guests, even if an umbrella was required.

And here are the newlyweds smooching it up again. She actually pulled him in by his necktie to get this kiss.

Here's a non-wedding photo from the weekend. I wish I could say I actually took the time to look around, but I was anxious to get home, so I only made one little stop by a field of dandelions for a couple shots.

So that's it in a nutshell. The entire wedding photo set (of all 302 photos) is on my other Flickr if anyone's interested.

Thanks for all your well-wishes and votes of confidence. It was a really good learning experience for me.

Labels: friends.who.rock, photography, wedding.photography, weddings

I have the distinct honor and pleasure of photographing my friend Alana's wedding tomorrow. She is a talented designer, photographer, musician, and hot rock 'n' roll mama. I'm so happy for her and her almost-hubby-Dave. It's going to be a beach sunset wedding in Michigan, so no stuffy boring wedding here.

So why the need for a confession? Well, two things. First of all, this will be my first wedding as THE photographer. That scares the bejeebus out of me. I've had butterflies in my stomach for over a week now. I know I should just get over myself, but I still get that, "What if I totally f*ck up?" knot in my brain every time I do a semi-important photoshoot. Wanna know why I'm not shooting photos for a living? This is why. The stress would kill me, I think. And still, I know I'm just second guessing. So like I said, I should just get over myself.

Second, Ted couldn't get off of work for the wedding. Since bringing Cadence to the wedding without someone to watch her would spell potentially disastrous results for my shutterbug duties, I reluctantly decided to leave her at home. What's the big deal? Well, this is an overnight trip, and I've never spent a night away from Cadence since she emerged from my womb. Ok, there was that one Wilco/Detholz! concert in Urbana that I photographed when she was five months old and I didn't get home until the middle of the night, but I was only gone a total of 12 hours then. I skipped Wilco's encore AND pumped breastmilk in the car while Ted drove to keep our time away to a minimum.

I know a bunch of you are laughing at me that I'm actually not jumping up and down with glee that I get a night all to myself in a waterfront hotel in lovely Saugatuck, MI. I know I'm being silly, but I can't help it. I know Cadence will be just fine. I should just embrace this opportunity to be alone to do whatever the heck I want (within reason, of course). Still...I'm gonna feel mighty out of place without my family in tow.

Oh, and this is totally off topic, but some old high school friends and I got together last week while our friend Steve Elliott was in town. Steve has been making quite a name for himself as an author, and was even awarded the Stegner Fellowship @ Stanford University a few years ago, which is a far cry from his teenage days as a ward of the state or homeless in Rogers Park. Anyhoo, it was fun to hang out and catch up.

Happy weekend, everyone!

Labels: cadence, photography, prayer.for.the.paranoid, random.thoughts, wedding.photography, weddings

So I never went to my senior prom 18 years ago. I was too busy that night loving Jesus in Wisconsin (read: church retreat). I've never really regretted not going, but now that I'm a grown-up and don't care so much about appearances or being in the cool crowd, I've thought for some time that it would be fun to go to an adult prom. My friends at the Maplewood entity threw one last spring, and the photos were a hoot. I didn't go, of course, because I'm generally lame like that. This past Saturday, though, I got to go to prom. It was for 826CHI's fundraiser, and I went as a photographer. Although I was there dressed in mere jeans and a t-shirt (albeit a cool restructured Green Lantern t-shirt), it was still fun to be in the midst of the wild rumpus. I don't have too much time to post, so I'll just share some of my faves from that night.

There is something I just love about this one. Perhaps it's the ridiculous juxtaposition of this lovely, peaceful-looking blonde next to the girl in the gaudy green.

Oh, the things some guys will do to impress the ladies. I like the somewhat amused look on the girl's face.

I was tickled by the sight of this pile of shoes and accoutrement on the floor that just kept getting bigger and bigger as the night progressed. As crazy as things got, people were pretty good about dancing AROUND the pile and not falling over it.

Did I mention there was an 80's cover band? Called The Power of Love? They were a lot of fun, as you can probably tell from their outfits.

I didn't check the bathroom stalls or stairwells, but I'm sure there was some making out going on. I snuck a shot of this couple through a screendoor.


In the interest of time and space, I'll just post a pictobrowser of my Flickr set of faves from the night. If you want to see all 220 photos from that night, you can check out my other Flickr site.

You can see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: 826CHI, best.shots.monday, photography

This spring, I am attempting to get more experience in shooting photos of folks who are taller than 3-and-a-half feet. A few of my friends have volunteered for this experiment, and I had my first shoot with one of them Sunday afternoon. It was with Ben Miranda, my friend from the Detholz!.

We shot for a couple hours in the Lincoln Square area, mainly on the grounds of Waters Academy, which has a community garden. We did some typical portrait shots, like the one above, but I wanted to do something a little more interesting.

Luckily, Ben was happy to oblige with some interesting props and poses. This is one of my favorites.

I was especially happy with the shots taken in front of the very colorful fieldhouse next to the garden in the school.

All in all, it was a great learning experience for me, and I look forward to doing some more shoots in the coming weeks. Ben was such a good sport about it all, and it was a lot of fun. You can see some of my other favorite shots in the slideshow below. To see all the shots from the session, you can visit my more "serious" Flickr account.

Labels: detholz, friends, friends.who.rock, photography

Folks, I took hundreds of photos this weekend at two photoshoots, and I am mentally and physically exhausted (but in a good, satisfying way). A few of my favorite shots, however, are more snap-shotty candids of other people's kids. Like Caely here with her totally kick-ass skull tattoo. I like me a good color combo, and that fuschia and green is one of my favorites.

And then there's this cute shot of Rudden, Caely and Cadence. They were nice enough to pause their flurry of fun to pose for one group shot. Otherwise, I'd have a bunch of blurs. Not that I have anything against blurs, but it's nice to get a shot in which you can actually make out faces once in a while.

And then there's this shot of my cousin's baby Eden, who is now a toddler already (!!!) and who is extremely photogenic. It's already hard to remember when Cadence was this little.


Which brings us to the Robotic Housewives portion of this post. I had the pleasure of doing a photoshoot for my friend Jessica Hannah's performance installation titled Showroom No. 6. The slideshow above is of some of my favorite shots from the shoot. You can see the entire set on my other Flickr account. This was Jessica's graduate thesis for Columbia College's Interdisciplinary Art and Media department. Here's a description from her website:

"Her thesis work explores identity struggles, her subject being robotic housewives. Showroom No.6 is an installation/durational performance involving six live women displayed in the 1950s-era showroom of Renaldi Industries, a fictional manufacturer of robotic companions. Six phones allow audience members to hear the inner monologue of each female robot; lifting the phone receiver actives each robot to life. A video catalog details other companionship options provided by the company."

I also did a photoshoot Sunday afternoon of my friend Ben (of Detholz! notoriety), but I haven't had a chance to go through all of those yet.

I've gotten some of my friends to volunteer as guinea pigs for photoshoots (Ben was the first) because I'm trying to get more experience shooting grownups. With just these two photoshoots, I've already learned a lot, and I'm excited to be pushing my limits as a photographer!


You can see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, friends, photography

Hi, folks. I've got a post up on Shutter Sisters today. Check it out:

Small Is Beautiful

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

Hi, y'all. I'm posting the 3rd Sunday of the month in addition to the 1st Sunday over on Shutter Sisters. My latest post called Just Shoot It is up now.

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

I know I've complained and complained about the brutal winter we've had in Chicago before, so for once I am happy to report that the temperatures actually SOARED into the 50's yesterday. And thank goodness, as I've been itching to hit the streets for a photoshoot.

The winter's been extra hard on me, as it's left me uninspired to take photos of anything or anyone. Except for the occasional shots of Cadence and friends, it's been a dry spell for me shutterbug-wise. And I've especially missed one of my favorite activities--street photography.

Thanks to the time change this week, I had about an hour-and-a-half of natural light left after I got home from work last night, and I immediately rushed out with my camera. I kept things simple with just my 30mm lens since I HATE changing lenses. I didn't know where I was going to go shoot when I got in my car. I wanted to visit my favorite haunts in Wicker Park, but traffic on Clark Street was a bear, and the light wasn't getting any brighter, so I headed on over to New Chinatown in Uptown, by Argyle and Broadway.

If you live on the Northside of Chicago and get a hankering for pho or dim sum or a Chinese bakery, this is the place to go. The neighborhood is also called Little Vietnam or Little Cambodia, as many of the shops and restaurants and residents have connections to Southeast Asia, as opposed to mainland China.

While I was shooting some photos, I happened to hear someone calling my name. It was one of my best friends, John, who was riding his bike down Argyle on his way to a bar called Big Chicks on Sheridan. Funny thing was, I had left a message on John's answering machine that morning telling him I'd be doing a photoshoot that evening. I didn't say where, and he never even got the message as he hadn't been home all day, so it was quite a pleasant surprise to run into him.

I feel a bit rusty when it comes to shooting, so I'm going to have to do a bunch more of these photoshoots. Back when I was a single gal living alone on the Wicker Park/Bucktown border, I did a photoshoot wherever I went. I think that was a little extreme, and now (especially with a kid) I recognize the need to put away the camera sometimes and just let things BE. But still, I can't help feeling a bit nostalgic about those days...

I'll post some other photos from last night in a slideshow below so you don't have to keep scrolling forever. Just click on the photo to go to the next one, or click on a thumbnail to see that photo.

Labels: i.heart.chicago, memory.lane, photography, photos

So my friend Tim Lowly, husband of our church's wonderful pastor Sherrie Lowly and instigator for the Tim Lowly Ensemble which Ted drums for, also happens to be a talented and well-respected painter. He is a teacher/artist-in-residence at North Park University, where he also directs the gallery. I have been a fan of Tim's paintings for as long as I've known him. His images often resonate with the deepest places of my heart, and someday I'm going to scrape together enough money to buy me one of his works.

Lately, however, he's been making more and more art in Photoshop with photos he's taken. The stuff is pretty amazing. He posted the "photo" above of Cadence on his Flickr stream, and I absolutely love it. I'm not a big fan of drastic Photoshop alterations (I can't even get simple textures down), but the stuff that Tim does just makes my jaw drop. I highly recommend mosing on over there and having a looksy. He also posts his paintings and drawings, which are also amazing.

Labels: art, flickritis, friends, photography, tim.lowly

A week ago, I wrote a post on Shutter Sisters about How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Blur. My best shot for this week fits quite nicely with that post. I snapped this photo while chasing Cadence down our hallway. There's something about this photo that I just love (and I don't say that about too many of my photos). Sometimes, the most perfect way to capture my little whirlwind-of-a-child is like this--a total blur.

In other news, it was Ted's 31st birthday on Saturday (which coincidentally was the 6th anniversary of this here blog). We celebrated w/ a few friends and family members at an Ethiopian place called Ethiopian Diamond. It's been a long time since I've had Ethiopian, and I forgot just how delicious it is. Chicago, esp. the North side has a large Ethiopian population, so there are a number of restaurants to choose from. I think we picked a pretty good one and hope to go back.

After dinner, we headed back to our place for more libations, including shots of a really really good bottle of scotch that I bought Ted for Valentine's Day. As you can see from this photo of Erik, the scotch had its intended effect.

So is anybody else's kid suffering from sleep deficit due to the time change? I have to say, that's the last time we have a late-night gathering on the eve of a spring-forward time change. We had to be up for church the next morning, and Cadence ended up getting only 8 hours of sleep Saturday night. Ouch.


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, birthday, cadence, friends, photography, teddy

Hi, folks. I've got a post up on Shutter Sisters today. Check it out:

How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Blur

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

I recently purchased the SB-600 speedlight for a little more versatility in flash photography. One of my favorite features so far is the ability to bounch the light on the wall BEHIND me. I usually hate the way flash is reflected in the eyes of the subject as little white dots, but I think bouncing the flash backwards makes the catchlight in Cadence's eyes almost natural.

Still, nothing beats natural light in my book.


Go see more folk's Best Shot's on Tracey' Mother May I.

Labels: best.shots.monday, cadence, photography

Ah, yes...The bride and groom. They both look lovely, eh? Vikki is Ted's cousin, and we happen to be pretty fond of her so we were thrilled that she found a great guy like Mike. He's got quite the romantic streak that is already becoming legendary in this family.

I took a ton of photos, which can be seen in my Wedding Flickr account if y'all are into wedding photos. As you can see, Cadence had a blast. She tore up that dance floor like you would not believe. For Three. Straight. Hours.


I did post some of my favorite photos from the wedding on my personal Flickr. This is a slideshow so I don't have to post a 2-mile long post to share these with you.

I'm currently at the Metra station. My shuttle bus missed the train, so I thought I'd do a little post (thank you, LF Public Library). It's been nonstop party in our household since Friday night, and it ain't over yet. Ted's sister Lauren has been staying with us since Saturday night, and the Sibs are going out again tonight. There is a snowstorm headed our way I hear. Thank goodness I'm back to my old schedule of working from home on Wednesdays...

That's the short and sweet scoop around here. Keep warm and safe, y'all.

Labels: family, photography, wedding.photography, weddings

Hey, y'all! My first post on Shutter Sisters is up! I'll be posting the first Sunday of every month, so check it out!

In other news, it's been super busy around here (when is it not??). Ted's cousin Vikki got married yesterday, and she and her now-husband Mike had asked me to be the 2nd photographer. That means I'll be post-processing like mad tomorrow. Plus our upstairs neighbor accidentally left her water running in her kitchen and fell asleep Tuesday night, and now we've got some nasty water damage. We've been running a dehumidifier 24 hours/day since Friday afternoon, and I think the dryness in our place has contributed to Cadence now getting sick. Grrrr...Anyhoo, more later.

Labels: photography, shutter.sisters

I recently saw this on my beloved inspiration Jen Lemen's Flickr stream, and it hit me like a timely prophetic word. Dismantle Fear. DISMANTLE. FEAR. Yes, THAT is what I need to do. Take apart my fears one by one, render them powerless in my life. And maybe in doing so gain some hiddens morsels of insight as to who I am and where these fears have grown from and how to transplant courage and hope and trust and joy into those places where fear once had its roots.

Obviously, this will be no overnight task. You see, I am a woman of many fears. Spending your most formative years in a fundamentalist cult, being hurt in ways no child should ever be hurt, failing at relationships that you thought would last forever, watching your dad waste away before your very eyes. These are things that tend to plant seeds of fear in a person, seeds that eventually grow into stubborn weeds.

Well, I've started my personal process of Dismantling Fear, and I've decided to begin with the Fear of Not Being Worthy Of the Company I Keep. The lovely and talented Tracey of Mother May I presented me with the perfect opportunity to do this by inviting me to contribute to a new online community blog of women photographers called Shutter Sisters. When I looked at the list of amazing women who had already joined forces with Tracey, my first reaction was, "There's no way I'm good enough to be one of them. I'm just a cheesy mommyblogger!" I began my email to decline Tracey's offer. But then I realized that I have avoided being a part of anything that would potentially push my limits a bit and maybe, just maybe, make me GROW a little. I've always been so afraid of not being good enough. And yet, I knew from reading the blogs of these women that while they are intimidatingly talented, they are also kind and supportive and encouraging. So I said Yes to Tracey! And now I'm a Shutter Sister!

I am giddy with the prospects of collaborating with these women and other Shutter Sisters from all over the world, cyber and real. Please check us out! Better yet, join us!

Labels: about.me, bloggers, friends.who.rock, photography, random.thoughts, shutter.sisters

...and it's mighty fine! That's right. I broke down and got me the Sigma 30mm f/1.4. Some of you may know that the lens I shoot with 95% of the time is my Nikkor 50mm f/1.8, and I truly, truly love that lens. For a hundred bucks, you're not going to get a better lens. The only downside is that because it's 50mm (which on my digital SLR equates to 75mm on a 35mm SLR), I'm always having to back way, way up to get the shot I want. That means arms-length self-portraits (like the one above) are out of the question.

With the 30mm, however, I can now get shots so much closer to the subject, like this one of Cadence who's doing her little "Mama, I'm tired" thing while holding onto my shirt. This is another shot I never could've taken w/ my 50mm.

Plus, I've been wanting to get more nursing photos before Cadence weans, and now I can take that myself no problemo.

I can't wait to try out this lens at a show. Now I'll be able to get the whole band in one shot without too much difficulty.

Labels: